Text in blue taken from the Washington Post article, “Does
online dating work? Let’s be honest: We have no idea.” http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect/wp/2014/09/30/does-online-dating-work-lets-be-honest-we-have-no-idea/
Throughout Eva Luna’s journey as a young woman, she finds
it difficult to make connections with men that will lead into a long-lasting,
loving relationship. At times, she is discouraged by the things men do to her
and is uncertain if she will ever find her “true love.” This can be connected to
something in the modern day—online dating. In the age of computers and
technology, online dating has become something that people look towards to find
their soul mate.
Eva’s relationship with Riad escalated from her loving
him as a father-figure to wanting to become his lover. This is the first time
in the novel that Eva encounters someone who she loves in this way. According to the Washington Post
Article, there are many reasons why relationships fail and some of these
reasons are applicable to both online and offline relationships. The reason Eva
and Riad’s relationship failed was because Riad thought of her as a child and
he couldn't see a future with her and also because of the situation with
Zulema.
“…I was still blinded by the discovery of
love. I knew intuitively that for the rest of my life every time I thought of
Riad Halabí, my gratitude would be renewed—and, in fact, it has been so….I
recalled every word of the previous night, and realized that the man I had
loved for five years as a father, and now desired as a lover, was lost to me.”
(203)
It’s a question that applies equally well to offline dating,
too: When a relationship fails, what or who is ultimately responsible? The
place where the couple met? The length of time they took getting to know each
other? Or something squishier, something less precise — a factor not captured
in charts and telephone surveys?
Eva’s next
relationship was between her and Huberto, but this relationship didn't give Eva
the kind of love she was looking for. Huberto was content coming and going when
it was convenient for him and Eva wanted more compassion and feelings out of
the relationship. Eva’s perception of what is a successful and loving
relationship is provided with the quote on page 229, and this can be compared
to what people nowadays view as a “relationship.” Marriage between a husband
and a wife is what Eva believes is true love and happiness, but nowadays,
marriage isn't as much of a necessity for some people.
“I dreamed of a place
where we could be together; I wanted to cook his meals, wash his clothes, sleep
with him every night, and stroll through the streets hand in hand, like man and
wife. “ (229)
“I was desperate, wild,
possessed, by a compulsion to enslave him, never let him leave my side.” (230)
For starters, there’s this greater cultural issue of how we
define relationship success: Is it marriage? Is it monogamy, a la Patti
Stanger? Is it what OkCupid’s data team calls a “fourway” — four messages back
and forth between two semi-interested parties?
A record number of Americans have never been married, and
only a scant majority — 53 percent — want to be.
Eva’s
final major relationship is with Rolf. At first, it seems as though their
relationship is one between friends and isn't going to develop into true love.
The end of the novel shows that the relationship does escalate into the “true
love” that Eva has been looking for. Although it is not made completely clear,
the reader can guess that the rest of Eva’s life exists as one big happy
ending.
Does online dating actually work?
It’s a simple question and a common one — one whose answer
could determine the fates of both a multi-billion dollar industry and millions
of lonely hearts….And yet, just this week, a new analysis from Michigan State
University found that online dating leads to fewer committed relationships than
offline dating does — that it doesn’t work, in other words….Plus a whole host
of dubious statistics, surveys and case studies from dating giants like
eHarmony and Match.com, who claim — insist, even!! — that online dating
“works.”
This much should be obvious: We don’t actually know.
The uncertainty of the success of online dating leads to
questions being raised as to whether “true love” can be found and if this love
will last someone an entire lifetime.
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